Swazis’ Sycophancy To Blame For ANC’s Ambivalent Foreign Policy

ImageAfter the reassurance by the South Africa’s High Commissioner to Swaziland, Happy Mahlangu, that South Africa would not force democracy on the country, there was the predictable uproar from sections of Swaziland’s Mass Democratic Movement, which called for the ANC led South African government to recall him.

As time will tell, nothing of the sort will happen, and it is ironic that this official position on the country came on the tail of a recent pronouncement by the ruling party that it supports the call for democracy in Swaziland.

This forked tongue approach to the situation in Swaziland is not new, and will not change anytime soon by the looks of things. For once the blame should be shifted from the ANC and laid squarely at the feet of Swaziland’s Mass Democratic Movement. 

Swaziland’s mass democratic Movement does not have a dynamic, practical nor coherent International Relations strategy. Its international relations can best be described as sycophantic, narrow and static.

Despite its relatively rich political strata, Swaziland’s Mass Democratic Movement has limited its engagement with South African society to the ruling tripartite alliance, thus limiting its own ability to take advantage of numerous contradictions within South Africa’s political parties.

The most obvious and yet alarming example is the manner in which the official opposition party, the Democratic Alliance, is treated like a pariah despite the leading role it took In opposing the ZANU PF government in Zimbabwe.

While Swazi political parties who hobnob with the ANC and who sometimes act as wings of the South African ruling tripartite alliance in Swaziland might find it difficult to seek allies outside the tripartite alliance, this does not apply to Swaziland’s other political parties, civic organizations and other popular movements. 

Moreover, South Africa’s opposition is so varied that all of Swaziland’s political parties can find suitable matches amongst it. It boggles the mind, for example, how Swaziland’s oldest political party, the NNLC, a party with Pan African leanings, has not officially engaged the Pan African parties in South Africa on issues of solidarity.

The Inkatha Freedom Party (IFP) should have long standing relationship with parties such as SWADEPA and Sive Siyinqaba, who share views on tribal influenced politics.
Most importantly, however, solidarity knows no ideological boundaries. The issue is democracy and that is something shared by all the parties on either side of the fence. South Africa is not the one party state it is rumoured to be. As long as South Africa’s parliament contains the multitude of political parties, they too have a significant role to play in shaping their country’s foreign policy.

It is time for Swaziland’s Mass Democratic Movement to evolve from streets level and begin to engage the entire South African political spectrum on the role that South African can play, as the biggest trade partner and biggest physical neighbour to South Africa. Democracy knows no boundaries, be they physical, racial or ideological.

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What Really Happens at the Annual Incwala Ceremony; An account by a former Inyatsi Regiment

The following is an account by a former regiment, who has since joined the revolution, of what actually happens during the Incwala ceremony. Read this true story and finish it, then print it and send it to more people and save many lives.

 My name is Sithembiso Simelane. My regiment initiation name is Sukulwenkhosi. I am 38 years old, born at Lwandle, near Manzini, but now I live at Nkhaba in the Hhohho region with my wife and two daughters.

 These months, November, December, January, and February are months that belong to evil activities in Swaziland as per Swazi culture. This is the time for the annual Incwala ceremony, known in the traditional circles as the national prayer. Many of our people do not understand the evil rituals that take place during this Incwala season.

Image The Christian community has tried to criticize the monarch for continuing to host this ceremony but their calls have always fallen on deaf royal ears. However, some pastors and Christians have decided to embrace these rituals so as to put themselves in the king’s good books when it comes to appointments into Emabandla (king’s advisors or parliament) as the king declared that Incwala is holy.

 I’m telling you this story so as to reveal the reality that people in Swaziland do not know, and to warn Swazis against supporting this Incwala ceremony blindly. Many people have been killed in Swaziland for fear that they were witches or wizards. It is so amazing then because royalty, more especially the monarch, continues to practice witchcraft and at a very high rate.

I was a member of the Inyatsi regiment for about 10 years and got to see all the evil that takes place in the royal residencies and more especially at Ludzidzini royal residence (Lobamba).

 Now that the king has gone into seclusion, he will be stationed at Mantjolo (near Mbabane) where there is a spirit snake, known as LaMlambo, belonging to the Mnisi clan. There, he will have the snake lick him all over the body for many days. As the snake licks him, the belief is that it cleans him of all the troubles he faced this year so that he emerges a new and strong person the next year.

 As he is licked by this monster (LaMlambo), Bemanti (water party) go on a journey to Maputo and some to RSA for sea water in the oceans. They carry small calabash containers called “sigubhu sencwala”. They stay there for days as they watch the sea and also following the moon-cycle.

When the full moon emerges they fetch the sea water and return back home after slaughtering a beast in thanks to the king of the sea known as “Inyoka Makhandakhanda”. They then return through two border posts as they raid our people everywhere they pass up until they reach Ludzidzini.

The raids are for (kuncutsa) collecting everything that presents each and every homestead all around the country (‘Insila’ in siswati) They then reach the royal residence and on that day Incwala Lencane begins at Ludzidzini. The king is seen there dancing with Emabutfo (regiments) and joined by the Queen mother. Many believe it is just a dance yet there are evil rituals taking place there.

 The king then commissions boys from all over the country to go and fetch the sacred shrub, lusekwane. The purpose of lusekwane is to cover Inhlambelo, a small krall inside the big kraal at Ludzidzini. Inhlambelo is where much of the evil activities take place.

The reason only young virgin males are allowed to take part in this event is because the evil spirit snake does not allow men who have had sexual intercourse before, or those that have children, to be closer to it for it considers them to be unclean and will defile the muti and weaken the king. That is why at Ludzidzini there are signs that say “women are not aloud this side” more especially at the official entrance of Sibaya. Even when the nation has been called to Sibaya women enter through the sides of Sibaya, not the main entrance, for they are seen as a threat to mswati’s powers.

Lusekwane is cut only when the full moon emerges and a sacred song is sung known as “SIYAMNTUNTUZELA, LUYADLALA LWANDLE”. This song is sung only once a year and then banned until the next lusekwane time. When the boys return with lusekwane, the expert elders then start the patching of inhlambelo until no eye can see through. This happens as the young men show their strength by bringing very huge and heavy shrubs to show their strength to the king. One thing they do not know is that the old men are angered by this because the big shrubs are useless as it is not easy to use them for these types of shrubs are too thorny. Only the small ones brought by very young boys are used for it is easy to use such.


Then there will be the catching and killing of the bull event. There are two sessions for this one. The first one is held at three in the afternoon a day before Incwala lenkhulu. The king expects the boys to show their strength by killing the bull with bare hands. They quickly jump onto the bull each with the hope of being the first one to grab it so that the king notices them. The secret here is that these young men have the hope that if the king notices their bravery, they will get promotions in their respective jobs, especially if they are in the security forces, or if they are unemployed, they hope to get jobs in the army or the police.

So they beat the bull with fists until it is so tired that it cannot do anything. mswati believes that this action signifies that his people, as they always try by all means to rise against him, will suddenly decide to abandon that action and be confused by his muti. The bull is then taken into the Inhlambelo where mswati awaits it, naked. The young men hold down the bull tight as the king inserts his erect royal penis into the bull’s anus. He has sex with it until just before he ejaculates.

On ejaculation a horn is brought so he ejaculates into it (hence the praises “uchamela enkhomeni nakumuntfu” – translated “one who ejaculates inside a beast and also inside a human being”). The sperm is poured into the horn so that it can be used whenever the nation has been called to Sibaya or any national event.

The sperm is mixed with the food that is cooked for the people on those events or ceremonies so that the people can love the king so much and be very afraid of rising against him. An ugly scene once occurred some years ago as he had sex with the bull.  It got out of its coma and all hell broke lose. It pushed him to the side and he started screaming for dear life until we managed to overpower the bull and its throat was cut to ensure it was dead.

 Once the bestiality process is complete, he then washes using muti on top of the dead cow.

 What inspired me to join the struggle for liberation was when I heard mswati, as he bathed on top of the bull using muti, chant about Mario Masuku and Jan Sithole saying “Ngiyamncoba Mario lonyaka! Ngiyamehlula Jan lonyaka! Angeke bangikhone! Ngimi lo! Angeke ngehlulwe ngemadvodza lamanye! Angeke balitsatse etandleni kimi! Ngalinikwa nguMahlokohla leli!” I was convinced that maybe mswati saw these men as a threat to his throne.


 After cleansing himself on top of the bull, the boys are then ordered to go to the nearby river to bath (kususa sinyama). They then go to sleep up until 2am the next morning when a trumpet sounds again to announce the second session of catching another beast.

This one is not killed but just held so strongly into Inhlambelo where the king repeats his bestiality tendency then ejaculates on the horn again and then wash on top of it with muti as he continues to chant about Mario and Jan. He then moves out to Indlunkhulu where two of his wives, LaMatsebula and LaMotsa, await him naked and he has sex with both of them for a short while but then ejaculates into his horn (hence the saying uchamela enkhomeni nakumuntfu).

These two wives, LaMatsebula and laMotsa, only serve this purpose at the royal family. They are known as ‘’Tesulelamsiti’’, which basically means it is where the king cleanses himself and removing all his dirt on. On the two women is where mswati leaves his demonic evils so that they carry it whilst he remains clean.  

As he is at Indlunkhulu the bull is then released back to other cattle for a whole year and is then killed the next year during Incwala in the fashion of the first beast. The boys are again ordered to go and wash at the Lusutfu River (kususa sinyama).

 Early in the morning, on Incwala day, very young boys who haven’t reached puberty are called to feast on the killed bull which mswati was fucking the previous day. It is believed that only such boys can eat it and not be affected by the strong muti.

 The next day is the official Incwala, where everybody will try to appear traditional by being part of this activity. The king joins this dance after checking the guard of honor and the singing of the national anthem. After the two hours of dance, the media is then chucked out of the royal kraal as some evil activities continue. This is the time for kulahlelwa ngeluselwa. Luselwa is a fruit cut from tintsanga. It is coated with strong muti and is thrown at one of the boys by the king. The boy, after it has been thrown at him, has to run faster than the king back to Inhlambelo lest he gets insane for the rest of his life. Unfortunately, most of the boys fail to run faster than the king because he throws the fruit and runs first. When the boy picks it up and tries to follow, the king is, by that time, already at the entrance and the boys lack the courage to push him aside so that they can be first to enter. At the end these boys literally go insane and are given employment in the army to cover this problem.

 I must reveal here that these boys to whom the fruit was thrown later usually commit murder, a direct cause of being thrown at with the luselwa. They include even those from the time of the late king Sobhuza II such as Vacu Magongo who is Indvuna yemabutfo and also in the king’s advisory committee.

 During the process of kulahlelwa ngeluselwa, these young boys are given small shields with no sticks in them (imigobo). They are always chosen from the Inyatsi regiment kraal (about 20 boys in total) and ordered to dance at the entrance to the small kraal (Inhlambelo) for this session. Senior regiments dance far at a distance, in the middle of Sibaya so they don’t see a thing.

The king then comes out of Inhlambelo dressed in some funny attire made up of grass and tree branches and inyoni (head gear) on his head and painted all over his body with black lotions (muti). He dances into a song that says “uyinkhosi yamakhosi” (you are king of kings”) as he moves forward into the terrified boys and back carrying the fruit.

On that occasion mswati seems like a mad man and he terrifies the young boys and the Indvuna will shout “do not be afraid of your king, he can’t harm you, he loves you all.” This is known to be a way in which the king cleans himself of all the evils of Incwala with the strong muti and all negative energy which he deposits onto one of the young boys who then loses his mind.

 The next day is known at kutila (day of fasting) Many things are not allowed on this day. You do not sit on a chair, you do not cook, you do not sing and you do not fold you arms. Once you are seen doing this you are fined money by the water party which roams all around the royal residence.

 There is then the last day known as kushiswa kwelukhuni. In this activity all the Insila (dirt) that has been collected by the water party all around the country and the remaining muti and spells used for Incwala is then burnt at the centre of the royal kraal as people dance to traditional music. This one is very dangerous because it marks the end of Incwala and all who attend inhale the smoke and receive the spirit of being docile into their lives. After all this then begins the weeding of the king’s fields to prove that Incwala was successful. Men will abandon their fields at home to weed another man’s fields, very huge for that matter.


The above account is my own. It is meant to open Swazi people’s eyes and minds so that they see beyond the government’s propaganda that Incwala is holy. I must state that Pastor Justice and other pastors were correct when they said Incwala is unGodly. Indeed, nothing can be Godly with a man having sexual intercourse with a bull every year, having sexual intercourse with two of his wives in full view of other men, yearly causing at least one young boy with a bright future to go insane with the use of muti, and forcing many men to abandon their own fields so that they can go and weed his own fields.”


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Rise Against Inferior Education

The April 12 uprising Movement is encouraged by the spirit of defiance currently shown by Swazis from all sectors of society. In particular, we single out the ever militant transport workers who never back down until they have achieved their objectives, Limkokwing students and the country’s teachers.

All of these protests and strikes are part of a wider and deeper insurrection of the masses. Such an insurrection requires consistent and well-planned support from an underground movement such as ours. It is our duty to sustain the momentum of this revolution.

We must therefore follow up on the call by the Swaziland Solidarity Network (SSN) that all Swazi youth unite with the teachers on the 13th of June to launch an offensive against the systematic manner in which we are made to assume an inferior status in society through being denied quality education.

For as long as teachers are underpaid and universities lack basic learning equipment, the royal family will always justify its unfair appointments in the civil service, the country’s parastatals and private companies, with the fact that royal children have better education.

We are therefore encouraging all students in the country to join in the campaign against inferior education. The methods and logistics of our protest cannot be disclosed publicly because that will only lead to security forces flooding the streets. This information will be passed down to all students discretely prior to the 13th.  

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The Con Wolf Who Wrote Bullshit

There are times when something is stated that is so outrageously far from the truth that one simply lacks the energy to respond to it. One such case is that involving an article in NewstimeAfrica by one of the Africa Contact personnel whose name is not even worth mentioning. This article is an outrageous distortion of the revolutionary upheaval in Swaziland and smacks of a charlatanry not seen yet since the 1973 proclamation by king Sobhuza from the throne.


Writing under the headline, “The democratic movement that cried wolf”, this con –tact proceeds to portray the Mass Democratic Movement in Swaziland as nothing more than a bunch of liars who spend more time talking and making empty promises to whoever cares to listen when in fact they neither hope to make a revolution nor are they working towards it. He then ends the article by warning that in future the world media may not be willing to cover stories on Swaziland as, “It will be very difficult to convince them in the future that people Swaziland are serious about protesting for change.”


The preposterous part about this article about the mass democratic movement in Swaziland is that it lacks understanding of the role played by the organisations cited as misleading the public and it is clear that the con-artist has never bothered to actually conduct research into it. He is merely day-dreaming, loafing on the job, or to put it accurately, he is intellectually masturbating.

Had he done the necessary research then he would have known that the mass democratic movement cannot, by nature, mislead the international media because when the mass democratic movement makes pronouncements, it is primarily speaking to its members, the ordinary Swazis and therefore stating its own objectives to itself and all potential Swazi participants of the revolution.

To prove this fact, the three statements cited as “Crying wolf” were either published in the April 12 uprising group or the SSN forum, both comprising a membership almost entirely composed of Swazis. This is not a cry to the international media, it is Swazis talking amongst themselves and proposing a way forward, more appropriately commanding its forces.


This is a whole galaxy apart from the images that the notion of “Crying wolf” are meant to bring to someone who reads the outrageous article. The article is in fact a deliberate distortion of reality because takes the spearhead of this revolution and puts it on a mountain top where it perches itself, removed from the people, and directs a warning at international observers claiming an impending revolution when they know that none is coming. This is bullshit. It is kaka.

Moreover because it is written from an obnoxious ignorance, nowhere does the article take into account the fact that the April 12 uprising is first and foremost the aspiration of the most radical elements within the country’s democratic movement. Being radical it should follow logically that these elements will always be two steps ahead of the masses.


And being ahead of the masses they take the role of masterminds and strategists who propose a way forward and demand that the masses revolt. That a revolution was presented as a way forward was not even a novelty. The idea of a revolution in Swaziland is nothing new. Radical Swazis have proposed a revolution long before this con-thing was even born.

The fact that April 12 2011 did not result in a revolution does not in any way mean that there was no sincerity on the part of the organisers in its proclamation. It merely means that the people did not go past their fear barrier. They backtracked when faced with an insurmountable repression. And it was one hell of a repression.


And this is where one has to question the motives of the article because it blatantly ignores the drastic repression which took place on that day, and the fact that the international media that the movement is purported to be more interested in was also a victim of it. Revolution is not a walk in the park that happens in a vacuum, totally devoid of any resistance.

A revolution in Swaziland was going to occur on the 12th of April 2011 if the state had not crushed it. Only an imbecile would not see that.
Where is the documentation of the fact that Swazis were beaten, abducted and in some cases raped by the state’s armed forces?


Why it is not reported that in the afternoon of April 12 2011 not even a single leader of any of the country’s unions was free to continue providing a way forward to the masses, because they were behind bars? How much has this con-man done to highlight the fact that our most vocal elements, the youth, had their leaders arrested on that date under false “explosive possession” charges?

If this is the kind of journalism that Newstime Africa is about then it has to retrain its con-tacts if it hopes to be taken seriously. In fact the con-man responsible for this article deserves to be fired for being downright unintelligent.


This con-man, being of British origin ought to know the difference between a proposed way forward directed at the masses and a warning directed at international media. Moreover, as a journalist he should be able to determine the audience of a statement by simply reading it. All this he dismally fails to see because he is in fact looking through jaundiced eyes.

The truth of the matter is that none is a biased and complicit in such matters as those who pretend to be mere objective observers. By observing from ignorance such con-artists end up presenting the movement as what their minds would have them believe it is. No scientific or scholarly work is employed in determining the true nature of the struggle and the pronouncements it makes about itself. Instead, we are left with a shallow and blurred view replete with the observer’s own prejudices towards the capacity and sincerity of an African movement, as observed by a national of the former colonial power which still has a vested interest in the affairs of the country.

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Stop the King’s Birthday Celebrations or Go to Work

The April 12 Swazi Uprising Movement would like to send a humble plea to all Swazis to disregard the so-called holiday on the 19th of April. The entire country will be in Nhlangano stopping the celebrations that will see our hard earned taxes being blown away by an imbecile who doesn’t even know how to count from ten to zero.

Swaziland has, in a matter of a few weeks, become the most expensive country in the region. All this is due to the increased taxes, notoriously packed at Value Added Tax (VAT). With Swazis being so ruthlessly taxed, the one man who does not pay taxes in the country, and yet happens to be the richest, is adamant that he should take the little the country has and use it on a birthday party for himself, his wives and his children. Whatever he will waste means less for us, the poor.

This is pure evil. Why does he not go to Kuwait and ask his friends there to throw him a birthday party funded with petro-dollars.? We would gladly wish him a safe journey and hope that he never returns to our country. Instead he chooses to go to the poorest region in the country to show off his power to waste the nation’s wealth to the starving and poor Swazi souls of Shiselweni.

We are tired of this senseless gluttony. We need to stop this birthday party from happening by all means necessary and this is why we insist that if you will not be part of the contingent that will be blocking the route to Nhlangano Memorial Stadium on that day then please report to your daily job. Ours is a very poor country and therefore we cannot afford to loaf around satisfying the whims and caprices of an ungrateful despot who thinks that the universe should revolve around him.

We plead with the nation to show their disgust at this inhumane greed by simply going about their normal business on the 19th of April because it is not a day of celebration. It should be a day of national mourning. This is a simple plea that does not require the court’s permission. We will have genuine holidays when we will celebrate and commemorate, but next Thursday is a normal work day.

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South African Government Must Fund Mswati’s Birthday Party

Following media reports in the kingdom of Swaziland that the billionaire king had ordered his poorest subjects to donate money for his 44th birthday celebrations, the April 12 Uprising group has taken it upon itself to find a lasting solution to this very greedy despotism.

Swazis on Swazi nation land do not have the freedom to choose whether to give this money to the king or not. They are coerced into doing so. Failure to contribute towards this mad man’s birthday could result in an eviction or constant victimisation. Seeing the precarious situation that our people find themselves in, we are appealing to the king’s sugar daddy to satisfy his desires.

We are asking the South Africa government to please fund this man’s birthday party. This appeal is made primarily because we have noted the great affection that the government has towards this thief, murderer and chief plunderer of Swaziland’s resources. Our position is informed by the fact that we believe that this is possible.

Last year, when Swaziland was on the verge of a total uprising spearheaded by civil servants, the South African government saw it fit to fund the money-sink that is the Swazi kingdom, this despite loud protests from the workers themselves who believed that this “bailout” was nothing but a waste of money if given to king Mswati who is known to be wasteful and has the country’s priorities upside down.

It is not known for sure whether the loan eventually arrived or whether the conditions given to the public were sincere. What is known is that the South African president was willing to give the money to the spendthrift regardless of any protests from the Swazi people.  “If a country is your neighbour, should you allow your neighbour to collapse because you hold certain political views? Will that not impact on you?” said Mr Zuma

True to the assertions of the workers, a few months on and the habits that landed the Swazi state in that pitiful situation are again playing themselves out. Mswati is back wasting Swazi money. How will he ever learn that spending millions on a useless birthday party in the midst of poverty goes against common sense if every time the country runs out of money some sugar daddy is always waiting to give him more?

The South African government aside, in all honesty the ANC itself as a party has not helped the situation in Swaziland with its own profligate spending such as the centenary celebrations in Mangaung which alone cost a whooping R100 million, this despite the fact that poverty in the country is still rampant. Africa’s ruling elite are a travesty of leadership. None amongst them holds a higher moral ground and it is therefore impossible to expect one to lead the other in the right direction.

The unfortunate reality, however, is that Shiselweni folk are destitute. To save these poor souls from the greedy Imfingo who seeks to scrap the little that they have to survive, the South African government must simply hand him a cheque signed “Yours truly, Sugar daddy” and let the man drink himself to death.


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Republic Now!!!

Poster for mass distribution

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